This reminds me of the little piece I've recently posted on the not-so-noble drives I find at the core of my own artistic pursuit, dealing with the pride that comes even when confessing about pride, and the ultimate solution I came to. I think approaching it with unwavering honesty is the first and most crucial step, and that ultimately the artist might only be fully freed from this hunger from validation when he comes to fully accept it for what it truly is, and what it serves and protects from.
You're right that honesty is the most crucial step. I've found that writing about the need for validation and admitting it to the world helps to facilitate acceptance - realizing that other people feel this way too, even to the same extreme degree as you, makes you feel more human.
ive also been reflecting a lot on vulnerability recently, and how much the fear of being vulnerable in an unattractive way (to be perceived as flawed) has inhibited my life. this was v relatable, and thank you for the vulnerability! also curious how this plays across different mediums - have you felt or seen a difference in your own comfort or the need for validation when performing on stage live vs posting a video or publishing a newsletter?
I actually bombed a show recently, forgot all the words to one of my favorite covers and had to skip to the second verse. When I got off the stage people still told me I killed it and that I sang my heart out, etc. but I couldn't help but feel that deep down they were as embarrassed as I was. Even though that's probably not true. Videos + newsletters are a lot easier cause you can edit until you're satisfied.
i feel like live music is so much about experiencing the energy, that it's probably what shone through the most. true re: being able to edit videos and newsletters, but then those are out there for anyone to perceive (and judge and screenshot and copy paste) at any point, which is its own kind of anxiety inducing, while live performances are typically more ephemeral
This reminds me of the little piece I've recently posted on the not-so-noble drives I find at the core of my own artistic pursuit, dealing with the pride that comes even when confessing about pride, and the ultimate solution I came to. I think approaching it with unwavering honesty is the first and most crucial step, and that ultimately the artist might only be fully freed from this hunger from validation when he comes to fully accept it for what it truly is, and what it serves and protects from.
You're right that honesty is the most crucial step. I've found that writing about the need for validation and admitting it to the world helps to facilitate acceptance - realizing that other people feel this way too, even to the same extreme degree as you, makes you feel more human.
ive also been reflecting a lot on vulnerability recently, and how much the fear of being vulnerable in an unattractive way (to be perceived as flawed) has inhibited my life. this was v relatable, and thank you for the vulnerability! also curious how this plays across different mediums - have you felt or seen a difference in your own comfort or the need for validation when performing on stage live vs posting a video or publishing a newsletter?
I actually bombed a show recently, forgot all the words to one of my favorite covers and had to skip to the second verse. When I got off the stage people still told me I killed it and that I sang my heart out, etc. but I couldn't help but feel that deep down they were as embarrassed as I was. Even though that's probably not true. Videos + newsletters are a lot easier cause you can edit until you're satisfied.
i feel like live music is so much about experiencing the energy, that it's probably what shone through the most. true re: being able to edit videos and newsletters, but then those are out there for anyone to perceive (and judge and screenshot and copy paste) at any point, which is its own kind of anxiety inducing, while live performances are typically more ephemeral
https://youtu.be/u_8nAvU0T5Y?si=-GE-RzJ3QZGQFTif
Thank you for sharing this clip - I felt it deeply. Perhaps all performers have this in common.
I thought you might like it! 😊❤️ So human.